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A fifteen step program in “How to form an ulcer” (aka nearly lose your boyfriend and risk your own insanity)…

Step 1. Pick the busiest month of the year when your boyfriend has more to do than humanly possible.

Step 2. Fall in love with a new apartment. In our case it was a loft space that was sooooooo cool with 40 foot ceilings and 1200 sq feet and allowed for dogs! The down sides: right by the train tracks with hooting trains that go by all the live long day and night, it is not nearly in as cool a neighborhood (or as safe), it is further from BART, and it is more $$$.

Step 3. Spend two days waiting by the computer pressing refresh every 2 seconds in hopes for the rental application to come through.

Step 4. Get the application and fill it out.

Step 5. Get burritos and drive to the new apartment space and sit outside in the dark to see what it is like at night. Eat the burritos.

Step 6. Take the completed application and drive it at 10:00pm to the property manager’s office in San Rafael before anyone else can get their application in.

Step 7. Sit outside the property manager’s office for two hours until 12:00am and talk about whether this is the right decision or not.

Step 8. Get cold feet, don’t turn the application in and drive home. Boyfriend is relieved, girlfriend is having second thoughts.

Step 9. Wake up the next day to a girlfriend with regret pains (aka start of ulcer). Boyfriend drives back to San Rafael to turn the application in (aka start of ulcer).

Step 10. Wait for days and days for the credit dude to do his job.

Step 11. Convince your current property managers to allow you to give a temporary 30-days notice (when it is actually now 29 days) even though you don’t know if you have  a new apartment or not.

Step 12. Wait. Deliberate. Get nervous.

Step 13. Go back to the space and check it out once more. Girlfriend loves it boyfriend is not so sure.

Step 14. Think too much. Get way too many people involved in helping you make a decision. Try to sleep through the night. Don’t sleep. Girlfriend has dreams about boyfriend leaving her because the loft rental was too stressful.

Step 15. 1:30 pm…your application is accepted. 2:00pm you call the boyfriend for a final decision (all while you know you have to give your current property managers a final decision on whether to continue with your 30 days notice or not by 5:00pm that day). Boyfriend and girlfriend talk over and over and make up their minds 2983758275987 times but then change it 2.5 seconds later. 4:30pm the ulcer starts to take full effect. 4:45 you pass on the opportunity.

Ulcer.

The loft space at night…don’t tell me it is cool because it is gone. Moving on.

If you go to Montpellier, France…here is what you should do:

Go to the beach…..

Walk through a little town that I don’t know the name of, but it is protected by UNESCO so that should help you figure it out. I was not prepared for this, but if you do go take hiking shoes so you can go on a nice jaunt in the hills…

Find a great vineyard and do some wine tasting….

Then eat some food while sipping wine. Go to a place that has food you could never make for yourself and you know is probably some crazy part of an animal you never thought you would eat but you actually like the taste…

Then hold a massive bottle of wine while people run off into the sunset. Which is honestly what I am doing here…

 

Ok, back from France. Actually, I’ve been back for two weeks now but not mentally really. Have I officially unpacked everything? Noooo. Have I done laundry from the trip? Nooooo. Is the apartment in a good shape? No way. Maybe January things will get better. Ha!

A few days after coming home I ran off to Colorado for a girls weekend with a mom, a sister, a 2.5 year old, a 2.5 month old, two female dogs and me. The highlights:

1.) Having my 2.5 year old niece sing into her baby monitor when she was ready to get up from a nap, “Allllllliiiissssoooouououuoun (kind of like an Indian-ish yodel tone), I have to go pottttttyyyyyiiiiyyyyy.”

2.) Going out to dinner with the girls and having the 2.5 year old under the table (on a floor covered with her spaghetti) looking for her pacifier while and not finding it so my mom then put the 2.5 month old on the bench and joined the 2.5 year old under the table on the spaghetti floor to look for the pacifier. All the while my sister and I tried to control things…actually, I drank (downed) my mojito.

3.) Swimming with my niece in the kiddie pool which was really “warm.” The best part: imagine a really tall, really white gal squeezing into a tube slide with a 2.5 year old on her lap and then spilling out of the slide a top lots of little kids. I was a giant white gal amongst the little ones but it was so worth it. We also went round and round the lazy river singing “lllllllaaaaazzzzyyyyy riiiiivvvvveeeeeerrrr” (again in an Indian-ish yodel…the thing my little niece has somehow being doing a lot of lately).

4.) Taking a cuddled up nap with the 2.5 month year old. I have never napped with a little tiny baby before but we were such cuddle buddies. I didn’t want it to end!

5.) Going to the Denver zoo which was really pretty impressive however the entire time I kept thinking, these animals shouldn’t be here. Nonetheless I did find my new favorite animal: the Elephant Shrew!

Wait a minute! I have not shared any of the France adventures! Oh my it was a great trip. If you ever have the chance to go to Montpellier in the south of France go! And find a French family to show you around…it makes all the difference. The bride and groom were so amazing in showing a group of us non-French folk around…they took us to the beach (watch for topless mammas!), hired a local expert to show us around the amazing town, took us to a private organic winery and arranged for a wine tasting that was INCREDIBLE, took us on a hike in a town protected by UNESCO, had a fantastic rehearsal dinner and the wedding/reception were one for the record books. 1.) We didn’t start eating until about 9 or 10:00pm (the true European way), 2.) Cake cutting didn’t happen until 1:00am or so 3.) The DJ didn’t play “Celebrate” or “Shout” (not that they are bad or anything) but instead folks danced to Austin Powers inspired French lounge-ish music. Cooper and I didn’t go to bed until about 3am but rumor has it the groom’s parents were some of the last to party…until about 6am. Whoa!

 

I have pictures of my trip home and France and all that jazz but they are amongst 193752357928375298759283759283759237 photos from the past few months that I can’t get to them at the moment. I will be sharing, oh yes! For now, enjoy the elephant shrew.

 

 

Off to France.

That is all at the moment.

A little rundown on what our lives as nomads has entailed. It is almost weird to be home in a normal bed and go to a grocery store to buy food to make dinner rather than find a restaurant to make us something. I feel a bit overwhelmed because our apartment is a pit hole, I’ve got work to do, laundry to clean, photos to edit, albums to design, I am hungover from drinking water (yes water) at the wedding yesterday, tired and cranky…and lo and behold we are off to France tomorrow. All I really really want to do at the moment is clean out my closet. I have been craving a closet cleaning for ages now. Ho hum. But life is good.

Here is the general run down on how the past nomadic trips have gone:

Our flight to St. Thomas was to leave SFO at 6:00am on Wednesday morn. Since BART didn’t run that early we decided to get a room at the SFO airport for the night. Unfortunately, the hotels.com reservation was a fluke because the hotel didn’t actually have space so we ended up sleeping on the airport floor. I’ve slept in a train station before after drinking beers at Oktoberfest, but never an airport floor. Actually, I don’t think you’d call it sleep…more like half sleep and shiver from the cold for 4 hours. Painful.

St. Thomas was awesome. If you ever want to take a trip to the Virgin Islands where you don’t want to deal with exchange rates and don’t mind driving on the other side of the road St. Thomas in July is the place to go. The water there is incrrrrredble. Ashley’s wedding was fantastic and she looked beautiful (see previous post). The day after the wedding Cooper and I were so excited to have a day to ourselves for actual vacation but unfortunately, when we set out for brunch I had 2938752938579287 people honk at me because of my driving (I was the name on the rental) and I got a few “no, no, no” fingers from people. Not only that but the locks on our rental didn’t work so Cooper had to climb in through the trunk on more than one occasion to get a front door open:

Needless to say we enjoyed the water on our day off for as long as we could (i.e. only about an hour) until the sun went down and we didn’t leave our hotel for food ever again. Here is what we look like eating a picnic on the balcony of our hotel:

Next came NYC. Cooper is this really great brother who invited his little bro on a trip to the big apple. So, Assi and the Carras brothers took the city by storm (semi-storm since it was so hot). We walked the city and witnessed a guy catch a pigeon with a fishing pole then put the dead bird in his man bag as though it was a common thing to do. Is this normal? A first for me for sure. We ate Pink Berry like it was the only food on the planet:

we went to B&H (camera store) for hours; went to Brooklyn where I bought an awesome wooden postcard; ate Swedish meatballs; attempted to get my haircut on a whim but I had communication issues with the guy who was to cut my hair (to the point that I was sweating on my neck and he kept touching my sweaty hair) that I left the salon without a cut…and with sweaty hair; attempted to go to the David Letterman show by myself (Cooper had to do an engagement shoot and Ross wasn’t interested in “the David”) and was 2 people away from getting in when they ran out of seats…story of my life; treated myself to a Bumble and Bumble haircut at their original salon which was fun but now I realize the guy gave me the same haircut everyone always gives me even though I told him over and over “no mom cuts” and “have fun with it…do something edgy”…now my hair is just three inches shorter and without style; went to the Good Morning America taping in Bryant Park and watched a free Feist (yippee!!!) concert…my mom said she saw me four times in the crowds that morning aka my 0.237383 seconds of fame.

Then Cooper’s bro was to leave NYC while Cooper and I made a jaunt to Connecticut for another wedding. A photo of three of us prior to the split:

While on the way to Connecticut we saw a truck on fire and a school bus accident with tons of kids on stretchers (to which we had a moment of silence). Aye carumba. We made it to the very American towns in Connecticut safe and sound. Thank the lord. Now we are back home just in time to leave again. Sweet begeezers.

Once upon a time a nervous Assi went to her “intro to college” session at Santa Clara before the major life transition (college) was to begin. While there she met another nervous Assi from St. Louis. The two nervous Assi gals hit it off right from the start. The first day they met they stayed up late trying to plan their courses for the year (dorks!), they peeked into dorm room windows and felt the sinking feeling of “we have to live in that?!?,” they ran through sprinklers (which was probably sewer water), and they went out for milk and cookies with two other soon to be college boys. When college began the Assi gals were good buddies and experienced a lot of crazy moments involving butts, webbed toes, boxes, trips to Santa Barbara, Yummy Yogurt, lactose intolerance, art history flash cards…just to name a few. Now one of the Assi gals (the one with the best tan known to man) got married to an awesome guy in St. Thomas and the other Assi (the one without any skin color) was there to capture the moment. Congrats, John and Ashley…I am so glad we could be there!

A quick side note…

While watching some show in our hotel room in St. Thomas someone used my “puder” (pronounced pooooooder) word in a different context than I normally do. Looking at the UrbanDictionary I realize that the word puder does not have the same meaning as I have been using it. EMBARRASSING!! I will no longer be calling myself a puder.

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Completely unrelated: Ashley was a beaaaaaaauuuuuuuutiffffffuuuuuuuuuul bride. So naturally beautiful the camera ate her up. We have not edited photos yet but goodness! Johnny is a lucky one. Congrats Ashley! I am sooooo glad we could be there to capture it.

I call myself a puder (pronounced pooo-der) when I have failed to do what I have set out to do. In this case: blog. (and clean my closet and paint my toe nails and take photos of our new pillows and stuff and stuff). At the moment I am an extreme puder. Our Europe trip is a blur so I don’t think I’ll get around to finishing the posting. All of the recent weddings are a blur and I can’t even begin to think about all that happened in Napa or Tahoe (except for finding gold, I’ll never forget that). Instead I’ll post baby photos. Yes, baby photos. Everyone loves a baby…especially when she is looking at you funny:

Everyone especially loves a smiling baby…

Does my lack of blogging make you sad?

So sorry, but if you do a jig and remember that it is summer and there is a big world  outside waiting for you that frown will turn upside down in no time.

(side note, these photos are not super sharp, but poor Cooper has 237529387532987 things to do before our next trip that I can’t get the original sharp images…I had to pull stuff from snapfish).  Better something than nothing, right?

Three events from this past weekend that made me smile:

1.) Dinner with my bro and sister-in-law. Fun to catch up with family every now and then and eat a good meal. Especially when that family member just bought a new boat and has aspirations to sail around the world.

2.) Getting a new and easy to use sewing machine and making PILLOWS!! for our couch. So dang fun. I even bought some new fabric to make some bags. Diddily dang whoo yaa day.

3.) Going to Renegade Craft Fair and finding the bamboo ring I have been on the hunt for for ages now made by these fabulous ladies: Twee Things.  Then, thinking I was sure I was going to get a t-shirt with either a deer playing an accordion or a squirrel playing the drums, I actually ended up having hot flashes while looking through these photos…I couldn’t make up my mind on which one I loved best so I ended up buying one large print and two small cards. Oh my, I absolutely LOVE her stuff. I could fill my house with her box prints. Yeah, I blew through a bit of $$$, but it was soooooooo worth it.

I probably won’t be able to post for a few days (surprise!) because we are off to St. Thomas in the Virgin Islands for a few days for Ashley’s wedding (yay Ashley!)…then to NY to “kill time” before another wedding in Connecticut. Did I mention Cooper just got a wedding in Bali for next year? Man alive I should invest in the airline industry…then again…maybe not.

Sooooo, I’ve been a little bloggish sloggish (kind of like sluggish but sloggish). It isn’t that I have not thought about blogging, but I just haven’t had the time. Actually, I have had time since I watched/wasted three hours of my life on Monday watching the Bachelor (gag me, I know)…but while watching I was doing something else on the computer, I just can’t remember what. The Bachelor causes memory loss! Ha!

Since I wrote last I have: been to work, worked for Cooper at night going through 29385729387592837592837592375 photos, gone to Napa for Justin/Lucille’s wedding, driven to Lake Tahoe with Charliemann and Cooper for Mike and Jill’s wedding, been to Colorado and back, and watched The Bachelor. I have so much to share…like Jim-isms, panning for actual gold, teaching a 2.5 year old how to do a rain dance only to have it pour rain after we finished dancing, etc., I just need a day to write. But, guess what! This weekend we don’t have a wedding! It is the only free weekend until September so I am going to clean my closet, help Cooper get caught up, design some albums, maybe go to a craft fair, make an Emily’s pizza and cinnamon rolls, and BLOG (i hope). I can’t wait.

In the meantime…drink a cold beer!

Countries like Austria and Switzerland are without question top of my list in places to experience (or live, if I could!). There is something in me that just absolutely loves the beauty and culture of the people and land (oh, and the food of course!).

The train ride through northern Italy was amazing, but it wasn’t until we got into the Swiss mountains when I felt overwhelmed and awestruck. On the train we sat near an Aussie/New Zealand couple in their late 60s who shared with us the incredible views and their travel stories. These guys have been nearly everywhere and have done it all. They were inspiring folk, no doubt…I want to be like them when I grown up.

Once we arrived in Lausanne we decided to forgo the cab option and even though we didn’t know where we were or where our hotel was we just starting walking. Luckily it was the right direction and not too bad of a trek. First impression of Switzerland and Lausanne: clean and orderly! Compared to my little nook in Rockridge/Oakland and compared to Florence, Lausanne was the tidiest little spot on the planet. Even our hotel room was impeccable. We unloaded our stuff and set out for some food. Unfortunately, food in Switzerland was not cheap, at all. A salad started at $17 US, a hamburger was $20…and this stuff wasn’t over the top amazing foods…just ordinary grub you could find for $5-6 in the US. So, we learned our lesson: Switzerland was going to be pricey (which we knew, it was just a bit of a sticker shock at first). However, our shock and awe was helped by the bartender at the local pub giving us two for one beers. What a wonderful wonderful feeling that is (especially when you are in a crowded pub surrounded by tons of Europeans all speaking different languages while they watch a football game).The next day we over ate a complimentary breakfast (which was AMAZING!) then started out for a round of checkers…

Allison was a little slow with each game and could never quite beat Cooper-tron. I guess his massive head must have a large brain in it or something.

We then headed through Ouchy (to which Allison had to say “Ouchy, ouchy, ouchy” like a little girl with a paper cut…it is actually pronounced ooo-shay or some thing like that) and listened to accordion players #1 of 4 on the trip, walked past a sweet (as in cute) farmer’s market…took some photos of the two of us…

And then went up into the shopping district of Lausanne to find out that all of the stores close on Sunday. So….we went to McDonald’s (where they have fried shrimp on the menu!) to buy a $5 diet coke…

After we got our coke we came across an awesome looking cafeteria that had really attractive looking food (like Whole Foods style) but at really reasonable (i.e. normal US) prices. We knew that place would be on the menu at some point. While walking along there was an older woman on the sidewalk with blood streaming down her head…she must have just fallen and the medics were there to help…a sad sight. We went to a park with our $5 diet coke and sat and took the scene in. The park was impeccable like everything else we had seen…I could spend my life at the park, or at least search for dry land…

After our time at the park we went stopped by a design/art event where a guy was in a pink teacup hot tub then went to another park to pass the time until we could eat again (we skipped lunch). Our treat for the night: brots and sauerkraut, beer, and swiss style wood fired pizza. YUUUUMM!

The next day we ventured to Geneva where we did some shopping (just looked), walking, and of course eating. Geneva had much more of a city feel to it than Lausanne, but I kind of liked the home-ish feel to Lausanne. I took a nice nap next to the river in Geneva…that was awesome. No matter where you go though, folks are into their soccer:

From Geneva we had a few hours of day light left so we backtracked a bit and went to Montreux. I am glad we did because the sites by the lake were amazing! Look, even Cooper thinks so:

I’m still looking for dry land… (look at my pointy hand!)

After our days in Lausanne, Geneva, and Montreux, we headed to Interlocken which was a paraglider’s dream not to mention a bit of a tourist trap (but still beautiful). We decided to pick up a few things for a picnic lunch and head down towards the river. While in Italy Cooper purchased a log of dry salami as survival food upon the event that we would ever need it…perfect for our picnic So, we bought some fresh bread and some beers and headed towards the river. Cooper had the smart idea of finding a knife for the salami (although I put up a big fight because I wanted to gnaw at the log). Thank god we got a knife because look what was inside (!!):

Ever since I was a child I always had to pick chunks of fat out of meats…and I still do. My first reaction when I cut into the log was a bit of a gag but then I rallied and found it to be really really really fun to pick the chunks of fat out…a similar to popping a zit that keeps going and going and going. So I had a great time with my fat picking (although it took a long time before it was ready to eat). I kind of wish I could pick some fat out right now…

Instead, I think I need to take a break and eat some dinner. Until next time!